The Lucy Thread

Hi, table-mates! It's been a few days, and I must tell you, I've had one of *those* days! I call them "Lucy moments," in honor of all the snags that "I Love Lucy" got herself into. If you remember, I am about to embark on a kitchen renovation, and today, since I was home alone, I decided to clean out the cupboards under the sink.I filled a bucket with water & cleaner to wash down dusty shelves. I pulled out all the pots and pans, Tupperware & Rubbermaid containers, and assorted junk. I categorized the "keeps," the "stow away in the cellars" and the "throw it outs." Reaching far back into a seldom used corner, I lost my balance, knocked into the three separate piles and wound up somehow (I really can't 'splain it, Ricky) with my bottom in the bucket of sudsy water! What a mess--me in the bucket, water all over the place, former piles of pots, pans & containers sailing on the Kitchen River! Thank goodness I didn't have an audience! Has anyone else ever had a Lucy moment?

Follow-Up Postings:

Laughing to hard to think of any right now. What a picture. Would love to have seen it. Not to laugh at you mind you, just cuz I could use a really good laugh. Hope DH doesn't do anything to injure himself. That seems to always set me off on a roll that I just can't stop. Really pis**s him off. I'm sure I will think of
Oh yeah, I remember one. Getting ready for a garage sale. Hanging up things in the garage with cigatette hanging out of my mouth. Such an attractive picture anyway. So, one of these items happened to knock the "cherry" off my cig.
It goes, yes that's right, down my shirt, into my bra, between my ôô You know. Well, I'm not one with the "perky boobs" mine are large enough to go south. It wasn't funny at the time as it hurt like the dickens. But I'm sure anyone watching it would have gotten a big laugh out of my dancing (more like stripping) techniques. LOL

•Posted by: Joan/MN  on Fri, Oct 23, 98 at 17:23

The movie I have running though my mind of you guys is funnier than anything I've seen on tv for quite a while!!! (we all have Lucy moments.)
One time I came out early to make a pot of coffee, forgot to put the pot in, coffee all over the floor between cupboard and frig. Made hubby a malt once, went to pout it in his glass, forgot it WASN'T a pot of coffee and left the lid on. Did you ever try this??? It starts out real sloooow, then all hits the lid at once, and PLOPS all over everything! (We weren't married yet when I did both of these, surprised he was still interested!!)

•Posted by: kiac  on Fri, Oct 23, 98 at 17:37
ROTFLMBO!!!!!
I Love Lucy!!!!!!!!!!
O.K. Here's a good one I pulled. I'm cleaning like a mad woman, because I had out-of-town relatives call and say they were going to stop by on the way through town.....I grabbed an empty clothes basket and literally threw everything in it and stuffed in the closet....grabbed the vac and swept through the middle of the floors fast.....just as I was done I saw them pull up. I pushed the vac down the hall towards the closet when the d***** filter bag somehow broke spilling all that dirt all over the rug! Since it was a reversable rug,(actually one I had made on my loom) I quickly flipped the rug over and shoved the vac in the closet. Didn't notice until the company was gone that there was this obvious lump underneath...wonder what they thought was under there?????????LOL (now that it's long past)

•Posted by: Leslee  on Fri, Oct 23, 98 at 17:50
My mom and aunty Jeane always reminded me of Lucy and Ethel.(by the way, I'm a big fan of Lucy and RRRRicky too)
The best Lucy moment with these two, was when they were having a big party at our house. They had cleaned until everything sparkled and were very proud. Dad mixed up a pitcher of martini's...It was shortly after thier first martini that they noticed that they had forgotten to buff the kitchen floor (this was back with old fashioned linoleum tile.) Mom has this great idea. They donned SOCKS and proceeded to skate around the floor buffing. It was hilarious. Them in thier cocktail dresses, earrings, makeup, and bobby socks with a couple of martinis in each hand. There they were ....sliding at high speed from one end of the kitchen to the other like a couple of little kids. The memory is priceless. No laugh track necessary.

•Posted by: Leslee (on Fri, Oct 23, 98 at 18:23
oops....forgot to post MY Lucy Moment. Ok...its 7:30 p.m. at K-Mart on a Friday after work. I hate shopping, but I need a pair of jeans and K is on the way home from work. I try on a couple of pairs, find one that fits and head for the counter. Bear in mind....I wear a suit to work, jacket, blouse, skirt, hose, pumps. I walk all the way through the store to the checkout, stand in line and pay. Only then did I notice that I had forgotten (oh god this is so embarassing) to put my skirt back on! You all be nice now!:-).

•Posted by: Molly (oflynn98@yahoo.com) on Fri, Oct 23, 98 at 18:31
I Love Lucy Too
When I was still dating, I was trying to impress a guy by baking a Angel Food Cake. He came over and the whole place smelled wonderful. We went to check on my masterpiece and it was gone. The pan was bent and it had leaked out in the bottom of the oven. He was having a fit about the mess, so, I dumped him and moved so I didn't have to clean the oven.

•Posted by: Jan  on Fri, Oct 23, 98 at 19:48
Hello, I can relate to Leslee and her no shirt in public. Except for me I forgot to put my dress pants on one day when I left the house for the office. I was wearing a long shirt and thought I was already wearing pants. Well, I walked out of the house that way, and it was not until I got a cold breeze on my butt that I sensed something was wrong. I was getting married that weekend and my brain was not as sharp as it should have been.

•Posted by: Leslee  on Fri, Oct 23, 98 at 20:00
It was a skirt....not a SHIRT! Lets not make it any worse than it was....lol

•Posted by: donna ( on Fri, Oct 23, 98 at 20:31
When I was pregnant with my first, I wore pantyhose, pants and a top to work one Friday. Came home, hung my clothes on the back of a chair, and Saturday morning, put back on the same pants, with a heavy sweater and headed to our local Christmas parade on the town square. My husband and I were walking around and I noticed many people looking at me, and I was thinking, "hmmmm, I must have that pregnancy 'glow'..." My husband even remarked at how people were looking at me.
Several hours passed, we go to lunch, and all the tables are taken, so we take a place at the counter. People are staring more than ever! As we're walking out the door of the restaurant, my husband notices that I appear to be dragging something, so he steps on it, to pull it loose. It didn't pull loose, it only stretches......it was my panty hose that I had left in my pants from the night before!! I had drug one leg of those babies all over town. It had leaves, sucker sticks, popcorn, you name it, all over it. The funniest thing though is when my husband tried to pull them out - Do you know how far a pair of pantyhose will stretch? I'm telling you, the only thing glowing on me was the inside of my thighs!! Not only will panty hose stretch, but the friction of that tight, pulling nylon will make your skin smoke. This was definetly our Ricky and Lucy moment.

•Posted by: Sandy in VA on Fri, Oct 23, 98 at 21:37
You guys crack me up!!! LOL! I don't have a Lucy story that good, but I will share one that happened to a co-worker. She had just come out of the ladies room when an older man who was visiting from another office asked where so and so was at. She said it was just around the corner so she had walked ahead of him. She kinda bent over to look around the corner to see if the other guy was at his desk and then told the older man to go on over. She wondered why the man looked so flushed and why he was stumbling all over himself. Little did she know that she had somehow tucked the back of her long, madris skirt inside her hot pink underwear! She said she didn't realize it until she sat down and it didn't feel exactly right! No wonder the man couldn't talk!! LOL!

•Posted by: Patti  on Fri, Oct 23, 98 at 21:59
Oh gosh! I've been laughing so hard I hurt! You guys are too funny. Leslee, you got some 'splainin' to do, girl. You have to tell us how you got out of that mess--I just can't imagine. Embarassingly enough, I've had the same experience as Donna with the pantyhose trick. I was watching a regatta and I discovered it as we were walking up the Skyway bridge with about 100 other people. :-(
I had another Lucy moment today. I'd gone to clean our neighbor's party house for a dinner tomorrow night. We generally take turns doing this. I took the shop vac so I could clean the floor good. First I dusted all the counters and the window sills, etc. then started up the vac. Dirt blew out EVERYWHERE. It was like the tornado from the Wizard of Oz. What a mess. Unlike Lucy, I had to clean the whole da**ed thing again.
Lucy Moments!

•Posted by: LuAnne on Fri, Oct 23, 98 at 23:29
I can hardly even see to type this. You guys are KILLING ME.
It does bring to mind two VERY embarrasing moments. So many typos to correct here, I am laughing so much. Any way, back in my dating days ( for adults only)
Date and I went parking, then bowling. After we are in the bowling alley and had ordered supper, I looked down and noticed that my shirt is on inside out and backwards. IT WASN'T FUNNY then. It is now. Another is like Donna's only we are in our college music group and walking down the hall I hear someone ask who lost their underwear. I never admitted that they looked an awful lot like the ones I had worn the night before. Must have been left in my jeans and I just put my jeans back on. That wasn't enough though, a few days later, (you'd think I would have been very careful) I actually saw the flippin things coming out of the bottom of my jeans. IN THE SAME GROUP OF PEOPLE. I had no where to go with this, so just kept on walking til they fell out. Nobody said anything about seeing them come out of MY pants, but I'm sure everyone was wondering JUST WHO was losing their undies in the music dept.
LuAnne

•Posted by: Karrie  on Sat, Oct 24, 98 at 0:02
Okay, don't know if these are life's most embarrassing moments or Lucy moments but was I ever mortified!! They both happened the same year with the same best friend...she still laughs...and we were 12! First day at summer camp on a stationary bus, two buses parked side by side, the bus next to us drives away - for some reason, I had a ( vertigo) strange feeling that our bus was rolling, without a driver! So, thinking I was being heroic, I run down the aisle screaming to 'stop' the not moving bus....looked around and noticed the stares...we were not moving......duhh...best friend laughed for years, summer camp was a drag.
Later that summer, shopping with best friend in the grocery store, notice the most handsome clerk you could ever hope to see....start giggling as only 12 year olds can...walk down aisle, drop penny, bend down to pick it up, girlfriend nudges me gently with foot, I fall down, what the heck I'm already on the floor, start crawling and scrambling after the penny, look up, the world's most handsome clerk is at the end of the aisle...laughing hysterically at the dorky 12 year old on her hands and knees chasing -of all things-a penny! I hated puberty!

•Posted by: Barb/MI  on Sat, Oct 24, 98 at 0:15
Oh, man. This was funny. I can't think straight right now. I can't think of anything like these. My SIL did the tucking her skirt into her panty hose and then walked across the parking lot. Got a lot of stares. And someone else I know "wore" her underwear on the back of her sweater to work. Must have been a sight.

•Posted by: Nancy L. on Sat, Oct 24, 98 at 1:20
I read just today about how we need to laugh more because it's healthy.
I think I made up for lost time on all of these.
Only a couple of mine come to mind, one was walking into the bakery for a box of donuts and realizing a sanitary pad was hanging out of my skirt pocket. I had grabbed it just as I left and forgot to put it in my purse.

•Posted by: Diane in MD  on Sat, Oct 24, 98 at 1:42
The scene: Many relatives from out of state finally came together at our house for my first official Thanksgiving dinner. Everything seemed to come out fine. I was the last to sit down at the table, carrying a large bowl of the best unlumpy gravy I ever made. Somehow the bowl slipped from my fingers, spun, and plopped on the floor. The gravy completely covered my face, glasses, clothes, walls, ceiling, cabinets. After a moment of silence, we all laughed hysterically 'til it hurt.
Scene Two: Around age 19, several friends and I were strolling down the main street in the city. Every time we reached a fire hydrant, we'd leapfrog over them and continue on our way. For some reason, on my last hydrant, my fingers didn't let loose and I fell head over heels on my face. This had to have looked really stupid. Through tears of laughter, my friends asked if I was OK, and through tears of laughter (and pain) I said, "I meant to do that".
As distressing as many of these things are at the time, they are certainly what we look back at and remember with laughter. I have really enjoyed reading these tidbits at 1:45 in the morning.

•Posted by: donna  on Sat, Oct 24, 98 at 9:54
Driving down the interstate, miles from home. Dressed up. Good mood. Lunching with a college friend that I haven't seen for years. My third child (2 1/2) is playing contentedly with a battery operated play mixer. I can't wait to see my friend, I've made a conscience effort to look my best.....I've raked all the trash out of the car, my clothes have no noticeable baby fluids, my son has napped and is happy. I smile, I think, "he's so darling...." All the while he's got the mixer on warp speed.............
Guess who had to meet their "perfect" college friend wearing a fisher-price mixer in her hair??? Oh, but yes!....... Guess who ended up getting the mixer CUT out of her hair? Isn't life a hoot?

•Posted by: Sue  on Sat, Oct 24, 98 at 10:04
ROFL! I can't see the tears are streaming down my face, you are all so FUNNY! I had my moment a few years ago.. my first DH and I lived way out in the woods, 1/2 mile driveway far away from other humans. I had to go to the woodpile to get wood, no one was home and I was stark naked (my clothes were drying on the line above the woodstove) I get a chunk of wood, look up and there is a VERY redfaced hunter standing on the other side of the woodpile, he got turned around in the woods and was lost! What could I do? He already seen everything so I quickly told him to follow the path and ran back into the house.. I never did that again!!! He is probably still talking about that and my hubby LOL for ages saying our woods was going to be the most hunted territory in the county!
I too did the undies crawling out of the pantlegs. Yesterday I had a customer who walked in with a large bright orange pricesticker perfectly centered on the bottom of the zipper on her jeans, it looked like something had been "priced" I LOL and had to tell her it was there, DH was snickering in his office, she was soooo embarrased!
Sue

•Posted by: Sandy  on Sat, Oct 24, 98 at 10:33
This is all TOOOOOOO funny...and the dogs DO think I'm nutz! My Lucy Story:
When I was about 18 (22 years ago thank gawd) I worked as a cook in a local restaurant. We often got phone calls for orders to go and pages for restaurant customers and the phone was in the kitchen area. One friday night during supper rush I picked up a call to page a customer named Ima Byrd. So I politely, but frantic to get back to my cooking position, headed out to the restuarant floor and yelled "Ima Byrd, Ima Byrd" and again "Ima Byrd, Ima Byrd." I looked around to see if Ima Byrd would come forward only to see customers snickering and other restaurant workers laughing. I soon realized that I had been set up by a prankster!...I must have looked like a nut screaming I'm a bird, I'm a bird!!!....My Lucy Moment! Still embarassed to this day...but what a HOOT!

Sandy in Wisconsin
•Posted by: Decobabe (on Sat, Oct 24, 98 at 10:44
I spent an entire Saturday many years ago making desserts for a dinner party. One was a flourless chocolate torte (an unusual thing back then) that was made in a springform pan, and was so delicate that you were supposed to leave it on the bottom. It was then filled with coffee flavored whipping cream and covered with bitter chocolate curls. How did it taste? have no idea. I put it on a glass cake stand, and as I carried it triumphantly into the dining room, the metal bottom of the springform pan slid off the cakestand, it flew with increasing speed off the stand, hit a guest in the back of his head and then somersaulted onto the floor upside down. The gasps of astonishment were not for my accomplishment. One fancy pie had to do for all. Thank God I made two desserts. Oh, how much fun it was to be young!

•Posted by: Coconut  on Sat, Oct 24, 98 at 10:47
Okay here's another one. Diane reminded me of this one. For some reasons I'm not remembering these things until I see another post. Do you think I have some sort of memory block going on about all my Lucy moments. This was quite along time ago. When we were still in New Orleans. I had a small kitchen and A LOT of kitchen stuff. so there was this area below one counter that was open and clever me had put shelves in for all my commercail pots and pans. Well..one night my mate and I were having a little tiff. Those first years of getting adjusted to each other, ah yes, glad they're behind us. Anyway, as usual when I'm feeling upset, I'd made spaghetti for supper. My usual gigantic pot, so I can eat it 3 meals a day for a week. I'm cleaning up after supper and had put most of the dishes away, but cabinets are still open. As I'm "making my point" while putting supper away. Slip, goes the sauce pot, lands straight up, and this huge fountain of spaghetti sauce. sprays the whole kitchen. Same as Diane, walls, ceiling, floor, but I got the added bonus of also getting at least some on the edges of every dish in the cupboards and all the posts and pans on those open shelves. I don't think there was anything in the kitchen that didn't have at least a few splashes on it. Including the appliances. Oh yeah, our underfoot cocker spaniel Buffy got some too. We looked at each other with mouths hanging open, looking around in amazement. Then we started laughing and I thought we'd never stop. We kept looking around and pointing to all the areas. We couldn't even speak, were laughing so hard. But that was the end of the fight. And the beginning of hours of cleanup. The next day I made a skirt for the open shelves. Alittle late. By the way my mother's name was Lucy. Do you think that's the problem????ROTFL

•Posted by: Ms. Hudge  on Sat, Oct 24, 98 at 12:22
My most embarassing moment: I was 21, waitressing on a very busy Friday night at a family food restaurant. Because it was so crowded, we were asked not to use trays to carry the food - but rather do the "stack the plates up your arm" method. I was working the section farthest from the kitchen, so I had 2 walking speeds: faster and fastest! I grabbed my order - a child's portion of spaghetti in my left hand, 2 hamburger plates on my left arm and another burger in my right hand - and I took off. Everything was fine until I reached the table. I hit the brakes, but because of my momentum, the spaghetti didn't!! In what seemed like slow motion, I watched in horror as the spaghetti slid off the plate and headed towards the floor. That wouldn't have been so bad except the mother had left her purse on the floor. And that wouldn't have been so bad except she left it opened! There was almost no spaghetti (in a wonderful tomato sauce) on the floor because it was all in her large purse! She and I were both too stunned to speak. Her husband was sitting directly across from her and watched the whole pasta fiasco as it happened - and he just burst out laughing! Luckily, she started laughing, too. I wanted to, but that would have voided my profuse (and sincere) apologies! But I'm sure they heard the roar of laughter from everyone in the kitchen when I immediately went back to get a bus boy (and tell everyone "you won't believe what just happened!!").
It all worked out in the end. She didn't want anything for the purse because she said it was old anyway. (Very nice of her!) The manager had a hard time keeping a straight face as she told the kitchen to drain the pasta better so it would stay on the plate!! And the head cook... well, he tried to remind the secondary cooks each time a pasta order went out, but he couldn't get through the whole sentence without laughing! Everyone's tension on a rough night disappeared.

•Posted by: Leslee on Sat, Oct 24, 98 at 18:24
I have to agree...and my Lucy Moment award has to go to Judi z for coming up with this wonderful Post! Let's keep this going. I'm feeling better about my forgotten skirt with every passing moment. Spagetti Sauce on every plate? Oh geez louise!
P.S.- Patti- I did what any frantic person would do....I screamed and drew untold attention to myself, ducked behind the cashiers counter and begged her to go get my skirt. But she couldn't leave her cash register, so she got on the PA system and announced the need of Customer Assistance in the Ladies Dept. Huh! Talk about an understatement right? While I waited it occurred to me that I had just bought jeans. I put them on behind her cash register, and she had the good sense to close her line for the few minutes that it took me. There ....I hope you're satisfied....signed Mortified! LOLOLOL:-))))

•Posted by: Crafty Lady  on Sun, Oct 25, 98 at 1:19
This is more what my dog did to me than what I did.
Had this wire haired terrier that was always getting in the bathroom trash so we had to keep the door closed. Having a party with about 14 other people. Put a sign on bathroom door to be sure to close it. Someone didn't. We're all sitting around talking when I realize it's getting more and more quiet in the room. Look over and there is the dog chewing on used sanitary napkin as literally everyone is watching. Naturally when (redfaced) I tried to take it from the dog he decided it was time to play. He ran around and around the living room playing chase. He kept running past people but I guess they were too embarassed and grossed out to stop him! I finally caught him and got him out of the room as fast as I could.
Walking back into that living room was probably the hardest thing I've ever done in my life!

•Posted by: Judy on Sun, Oct 25, 98 at 2:07
This one should win the stupidity award. I like to cook several meals for the week in advance on Sundays. One Sunday I fixed a large pot of spaghetti sauce and meatballs. I wanted to use the pot it was in for something else so I transferred the spaghetti sauce and meatballs to a large, glass mixing bowl. I was running out of counter space so I set the bowl on one of the burners of my electric stove, forgetting that I had just turned the burner off and that it was still hot. Suddenly, KABOOM!!!! The bowl had exploded! My kitchen was showered with meatballs, spaghetti sauce, and glass. Luckily I wasn't in the range of fire when it exploded. I just stood there dumbfounded, looking at the mess, it was EVERYWHERE!

•Posted by: Shirley 'A'  on Sun, Oct 25, 98 at 5:14
Well, we set the clocks back last night, but I woke up at the usual time, so now at 5 a.m., I'm dying laughing at these posts and at the same time, trying to keep from waking the rest of the family.
My Lucy day was the time I sneaked out of the house to go from Connecticut to Valley Stream, L.I. to go swimming with a bunch of my teenaged friends. I had bought a pair of "Gay Deceivers", as they were called in those days, to fill out my bathing suit bra top because I wasn't as developed as some of my friends. In those days, the tops tied around the neck and the back.
When we got to the lake, I really showed off, trying to make all the boys see how developed I was. Then I ran down to the lake hollering "the last one in is a rotten egg", jumped into the lake, went underwater, and when I came up there was an old man standing waist-deep, cigar in his mouth, and a newspaper in hand. His stare made me know there was something wrong and he finally said "Lady, I thing you're losing your bathing suit" and looked toward my two rubber breasts floating on top of the lake. The tie around my neck had come loose and there I stood, naked as a jaybird, and as flat as a pancake. The boys had jumped in right behind me, so I just went underwater again and acted as if nothing had happened.
What an embarassing moment!!!

•Posted by: LuAnne  on Sun, Oct 25, 98 at 9:31
Oh no. Shirley just reminded of another one. When I was 12 or 13 I was on the swim team. I was over developed and that was embarrasing too. The coach was so incredibly cute. I had such a crush on him. Anyway, I had just finished a race and he was standing there congratulating me and going to help me out of the water. I'm hanging on to the side with the biggest cheesiest grin on my face, (You know the one) and I looked down and my left breast was floating on top of the water hanging out of my suit. I thought I'd die right then and there. Obviosly I didn't and I still am reminded of that everytime I see him. Oh the horrors of young and infatuated.
LuAnne

•Posted by: Leslee  on Sun, Oct 25, 98 at 10:19
Lucy Moments Rules! Perhaps we could make it its own forum! Only silly, funny, goofy entries. For when we all need to laugh at ourselves. In honor of this, I have another for your enjoyment:
Visiting my friends new house a few months ago, I took the shortcut and cut through her yard to her front door. I was walking all through her house on the grand tour, and as beautiful as it was, I couldn't help noticing a god-awful aroma everywhere. Having a happy dog...I knew that smell. Dog doo. While backtracking our path, I noticed smudges on her carpet every two to three feet. She didn't seem to notice, but then she has always been like that. When she wasn't looking I took a quick glimpse of my shoe...Oh no...there it was, the tell tale poo on my shoe. I suddenly had to go to the bathroom.(washed my shoe), and while she went to the kitchen to make lunch, I grabbed a wash rag, and started to spot clean where-ever I could see a spot. Needless to say...I got caught. I guess you had to be there.....Luckily...she's a character in her own right....we laughed and laughed on our hands and knees as we cleaned her brand new carpet from entry, through the living room, to up the stairs. She makes me take my shoes off when I come now...always with a twinkle in her eye!

•Posted by: Mary W  on Sun, Oct 25, 98 at 15:57
The exposed breast......me too. 15 yrs old, Came out of the water after snorkling for a half hour or so, about 20 people sitting around that stretch of beach. My Mom came down to the water fast! I couldn't see it cause I still had the mask on! I was just standing there talking about all the great fish & coral I'd just seen, while the left side of my top had fallen down! I was embarrassed for the rest of that day! I get over unexpected nudity much quicker for that experience! It may have even contributed to my wild hippie days & the nudity of that time & place! Now I don't think I'd like for complete strangers to see me nekkid! My body isn't what it used to be alas!
Mary W

•Posted by: Stef  on Mon, Oct 26, 98 at 9:49
ROTFL!!! Just caught up after the weekend and thought I'd share one of mine:
13 years old (that hated puberty age again!). My parents and I went to visit relatives in Houston during my spring break.
My cousin (who is older than my parents) had a dachshund (sp?) named Doodlesox. Me, being the boy-crazy girl that I was at the time, decided that walking Doosox (really what they called him) would be a great way to meet the guys who lived in the condo area. So, off I go to "my" room to change into my best cowboy clothes, boots, etc., so I'd be sure to "fit right in" with all the other Texans - I've since learned that not all Texans dress like that every day.
Grabbed Doosox's leash and out we go. Walking through the common area of the condos, I spot 3 - count 'em 3 - of the cutest "older men" (probably 16 or 17) I'd ever seen. Nonchalantly walk past them when Doosox decides this is the best place he has seen to do his business. Unfortunately, he decided to piddle on the sidewalk. Mind you, I was so busy looking at the guys while pretending NOT to look at the guys that I didn't notice. Once the piddling was over, Doosox made good on his name - dog poo on the sidewalk. Anyway, I realized that we had been standing still too long and that it must not be looking too "swooft", so I started walking again - right through the poo. I was mortified and the guys were laughing (not just at my stepping in the poo, but at my clothes!) I've never told anybody this story before! I'm glad this topic was

•Posted by: Leslee  on Mon, Oct 26, 98 at 9:55
YEEEHAAAA! Another dog poo story! Here we go, another round! I love the LUCY!

RE: Lucy Moments!

•Posted by: JoJo  on Mon, Oct 26, 98 at 11:01
Just checking in...had to get another dose of funnies today! I think I'll change my dinner plans for tonight. I was going to make spaghetti, but there seems to be a spaghetti theme going here. I don't want to take any chances! LOL

•Posted by: Ray  on Mon, Oct 26, 98 at 13:39 br book????? the writing is Who Sue. with am I hilarious. are These Wow!> I have to add two of my own.
My son was about 18 months old when we had to go pick up hubbie from work. I had to move the carseat from the house back into the car before we left. Well, I strapped him in and off we go. He started screaming and fussing and pitching his evening fit. I finally just ignored him. We turned a corner and his screaming finally stopped. I thought to myself, "well, ignoring him really works!" As we were pulling up to my husband's work, I happened to glance at my son in the back seat. There he was in the tipped over carseat on his side just staring at me! I think he was terrified that I had gone crazy from his screaming and decided to knock him over. Mistake was made by not buckling the carseat to the seat in the car. I had just strapped him in!
My other moment also involves my son. I was all dressed up from some meeting or another when I picked him up at school. My then six year old is a BIG fisherman, so I thought I would be a good mommy and take him fishing. I didn't think I should change out of my dress suit and heels, because he can bait his own hook and take the fish off. Well, off we go to the pond. I played with my daughter at the park and watched him fish. Suddenly, his line gets hooked. Mom to the rescue. I go get the line unhooked, and start backing up as I am reeling in. What I didn't realize was that behind me ran a drainage ditch. I backed right into the drainage ditch. Took a step back, ended up in mud and water up to my knees, and fell flat on my butt! My little gentleman of a son fell over laughing and screaming, "WHERE IS THE VIDEO CAMERA? You could have been on AFV!" I didn't know whether to kill him or laugh too. I opted for laughter as I gave him my hand to help me up and pulled him in too! hehehhehehe

•Posted by: Diane in MD  on Mon, Oct 26, 98 at 13:54
This is a Lucy/Ethel moment and I still feel awful about after all these years. My parents suffered thru 3 daughters getting married within 9 months while my Dad was laid off from his Gov. job, so the last wedding reception, which was the most fun, incidentally, was held at the house in the basement with everyone bringing casseroles, food, etc. My mom was carrying a huge casserole of meatballs in gravy when in fell on the floor (could have been me but I may be in denial!). Anyway, we all looked at each other - good - no one else saw! We picked up the meatballs, washed the glass off them as well as we good, whipped up new gravy, and served in record time. Thank heaven no one complained of any crunchies in their meatballs!
This should only have been done on a Lucy show. I would never recommend again!

•Posted by: Heather in GA on Mon, Oct 26, 98 at 14:56
All of these are too funny - they reminded me of a couple of our incidents -
Ray, I can relate. Several years ago, we were vacationing in the mountains with our then 1 1/2 year old son and three year old daughter. We have a minivan that has two seats in the middle instead of a bench seat. Both kids were buckled into their respective car seats, husband was driving, and I was looking at a map trying to locate an obscure cut-off road. We went around several sharp curves, and the three-year old kept saying "Mommy, Mommy" to which I said "Just a minute". When I finally turned around, our son's car seat had flipped over and was dangling UPSIDE DOWN between the two seats! Apparently, it wasn't buckled to the seat, and when we went around a curve, over he went! The mystery is why he didn't make a sound during the flip or during the minute or so that he was dangling! We still laugh at that.
Another memorable incident. When I was in college, I was in a bar with some friends, and decided to play a video game. While I was playing, one of the fire button mechanisms came out of its socket. For some reason, I stuck my index finger down the hole, where it became stuck behind a sharp piece of metal. When I tried to pull out my finger, it just became tighter (like chinese handcuffs). Anyway, after many attempts to get my finger out, the bar manager finally had to call the rescue squad to come and take the back off of the video came and dis-assemble part of it to free my finger. All of this happened in a crowded college bar, and I was mortified. (Actually the worst part was that I had to go to the bathroom for the 30 or so minutes that it took to get me unstuck!) For weeks after, people would stop me in class and on the street and say, "Weren't you the girl who was stuck in the Space Invaders game at Henderson Street?" I wanted to be popular, but not with that kind of attention!

•Posted by: Whitney  on Mon, Oct 26, 98 at 15:35
Well, at least my Lucy moment didn't happen in public! A few years ago, I decided to take a long, leisurely bubble bath. Shortly after I got in the tub, my husband comes running in the bathroom screaming at me to get out of the tub, a tornado is coming. I jumped out of the tub, blew out my candles, grabbed the kids and the cat and off we go into the hallway. There we are, huddled on the floor listening to this horrendous tornado go ripping across the roof of our house. All of a sudden I looked down and then screamed "Oh my God, I'm naked!!" In all the confusion, I had forgotten to grab a towel. Well, no way am I getting up in the middle of this tornado, so there I sat, naked and dripping, with a pink clay mask on my face, no less. I kept having visions of us being one of those families that they interview on TV amid the wreckage, with my husband telling the reporter it sounded just like a freight train and me NAKED. After it was all over, I was on the phone telling my mother about it and she, laugh

•Posted by: Whitney on Mon, Oct 26, 98 at 15:38
Cont. and she, laughing hysterically, asked my why I just didn't get a towel out of the hallway linen closet. Never would have occurred to me in a million years!

•Posted by: Leslee on Mon, Oct 26, 98 at 18:04
Its taken 19 pages to print this whole series ....
AND WELL WORTH EVERY DROP OF INK! didn't mean to shout, but I don't know how to make fun little colorful posts yet. Loved the Tornado , the baby, the meatballs (by the way I took a chance and made spagetti last night) and the fishing pond....and sooooo many others. What a group we are...:-))))))

Posted by: Sandi  on Mon, Oct 26, 98 at 21:54
Best one I can think of now, between tears that is, is my girlfriend, her sister was having a party, and she couldn't come, but her daughter went over along with her "blankie" all day long the little one carried this blankie around with my friends bra stuck to it, her sister then found it and the bra sat on her counter for a week waiting for her to come claim it.

•Posted by: LuAnne  on Mon, Oct 26, 98 at 22:06
This doesn't have to do with NAKEDNESS or anything. Just reading the Thanksgiving post and brought to mind our Thanksgiving about 8 years ago. Everybody was coming to our house, I'm cooking for all 27 of them. No problem, things are under control. Check the turkey, remove turkey, turn the oven down, finish last minute stuff. Open oven to put stuff in to keep warm. FLAMES shoot out at me and I PANIC!!!
Mom is there and we are trying to throw flour on the flames to distinguish it. Of course we are only getting handfuls at a time in and only succeed in fueling the flames with oxygen. DH is ready to throw the flippin stove out the door. I call 911 and Dh runs to neighbors to borrow extinguisher.
We did get it out before the fire dept. got there, but ALL the reletives show up with the fire dept. All these yellow coats running thru my house shouting "Did you save the Bird?" I'd like to have died of embarrassment. DH is now on the fire dept. and none of them remember this "visit" ot our home. Thank God.
LuAnne

•Posted by: Sharon G.  on Mon, Oct 26, 98 at 22:34
Whitney, your NAKED post made me think of a story. It didn't happen to me (I have buried all my embarassing moments in my subconsicious and it's going to take me some time to unearth them!) but my MIL.
My MIL has this strange night thing where she yells "Help! Help!" in her sleep for no reason. This probably happens three or four times a week. Well, about 15 years ago, my MIL was visiting her brother and his new wife at their home. She was sleeping on the couch. Brother knew of her panic attacks but not Maddie. So MIL starts screaming, Maddie gets up - yep, NAKED - and runs downstairs to find my sleepy MIL wondering why her new sister-in-law was running around, freaked out and naked!

•Posted by: Sharon G. on Mon, Oct 26, 98 at 22:40
Oh, wait, I thought of one. Let me preface this by saying my in-laws are terrific and no, I wasn't naked but....
Anyway, let's say hubby and I were pretty hot and heavy from the moment we met. Ahem. So one weekend, maybe a month or two after we started dating, his parents were out of town. I hadn't met them yet. We spent a Saturday over there, rented a video, and his parent's bedroom had the biggest TV and a VCR and...
Guess where this is going...
Hubby and I (NOT hubby then!) were making out on the bed and I was in a bit of disarray. That's when his parents decided to come home early! DH heard them and hopped up but I still had to run to the bathroom, straighten myself out and then slink out of THEIR bedroom to meet them.
They acted like it was the most natural thing in the world. God love 'em.

•Posted by: Karrie  on Mon, Oct 26, 98 at 22:48
Okay, have to add this and hope I don't gross everyone out...my good friend and I are out to lunch a few years ago. I am trying to sort of show off that I have this new parenting thing down to a science ( yes, a newborn is no big deal!) so, we are having a great lunch, baby is getting all sorts of attention from neighboring table...we get up to leave and I , of course, have to 'let' baby say goodbye to virtual strangers before leaving...well, baby has his own unique way of leaving his "calling card" diaper starts leaking from our table to theirs....yes, it was a 'stinky'....problem was I didn't realize it was happening until we got to the front counter and then realized the trail we had left....my girlfriend started laughing so loud! I was dying!!!! I swear, I ran out of there so fast! She paid and I prayed! God. never let me see these people again in my life!

•Posted by: Janalyn  on Tue, Oct 27, 98 at 1:36
My friend Sheri was renovating her bathroom. She invited me to come along with her to a high end bathroom reno place. You know the type, brass faucets, swimming pool size marble bathtubs and toilets that look like works of art. She brought her 2 and a half yr old son James with her and we were checking out the lighting fixtures. We must have spent ten minutes there being amazed at the prices that were being asked when James suddenly appears trying to walk with his pants down around his ankles. "Mommy, no flush, no flush" he said pointing to an emerald green toilet that was part of a "Dream Bathroom" display. Yep, James had christened that toilet in more than one way. Toilet paper might have helped.
Sheri was mortified. Unfortunately, the store manager was livid and refused our offers to clean up the mess. Obviously he didn't have kids of his own... :)

•Posted by: Diane in MD  on Tue, Oct 27, 98 at 1:54
Not to keep the bathroom thread going much longer but....our first duty station after my husband reenlisted in the Navy was in Sicily. Our sponsors met us at the airport and took us out to their beachhouse. Our son, 4 1/2 then, left the room to use the bathroom and came back and whispered to me, teary-eyed, that he pooped in the toilet but it wouldn't flush. And there was this huge pile right in the middle of the bidet! Boy, I could write a book about our two tours in Italy.
Well, enough of that!

•Posted by: Tiger  on Tue, Oct 27, 98 at 10:46
Well, when I saw 64 posts, thought I'd never get through them in one sitting, but I just couldn't stop reading them!! What an absolute Riot!!!
I've got one that happened to a friend of mine Jeff...He handled it soooo well!
We were both working in this restaraunt on a really busy Friday night. He had one table where the people were being "not so nice"...complaining about everything. Well, he finally got them all the drinks and food when one man said you for got my "side" of pasta (there really IS something to this spaghetti thing!! LOL!) So Jeff ran into the kitchen and grabbed the plate of pasta. On that end of the dining room there is two little steps...and you guessed it, he tripped over them! The table in question was the first one in the dining room and Yes, the plate of pasta landed upside down all over the table!!!! Jeff, being on top of everything, as usual, looked the guy right in the eyes and said "Will there be anything else"? Well that just cracked everyone in the dining room up, including the difficult table! We talked about that one for weeks!!
Tiger

•Posted by: Sue  on Tue, Oct 27, 98 at 11:10
I have several Lucy Moments to confess.. another was when living way back in the woods, no neighbors, and I just got out of the shower..
I opened the front door to let in the breeze and was standing there towel drying my hair (head covered in towel, bent over drying away, buck naked) when I looked up, there was a door to door salesman standing there blushing so bad I thought his head would explode..
I screamed and grabbed a robe and he was persistant enough to stand there the whole time trying to sell me kids books! (I bet he is still telling that story)
Sue

•Posted by: Marsha  on Tue, Oct 27, 98 at 12:42
My husband and I both sat down to a dinner salad each with our favorite bottles of salad dressing in front of us. We both picked up the bottles and shook them not realizing the caps were loose. Both of us were drenched in each others salad dressing. The funny part was we didn't know the other was drenched because we both closed our eyes when the dressing hit our face. We just started yelling and when the other didn't react quick enough we opened our eyes and got hysterical rofl. That was 25 years ago and we still laugh about it. We always check the caps now, too. PS His was orange russian dressing. Mine was italian.

•Posted by: Deanie  on Tue, Oct 27, 98 at 12:56
One hot day I had been out in the yard mowing. When I came in, I had to walk through the laundry room, so I took off all of my hot sweaty clothes and left them there for later, and then proceeded naked all the way across the kitchen and den, and down the hall past my daughters rooms to my bedroom on the other end of the house. When I was almost there, I found out that my teenage daughters had friends in the house and there I was doing my imitation of Eve. Gosh, but was I embarrassed.

•Posted by: Sue  on Tue, Oct 27, 98 at 13:48
I love this post, I have a sideache from laughing. I'll tell only one more, I promise :)
I married very young and had my baby at 19(I look younger then I really am). I hired a babysitter and my husband took me out on a romantic night on the town for the first time in months. We were still young and one thing led to another and we ended up "parking" in an orchard. Well, soon after a policeman knocked on our windows and shined his flashlight in telling us to get out our identification. He looked at mine (still had maiden name on it) and he proceeded to accuse me of being underage, false ID and called my MOTHER! Luckily he didn't tell her WHY we were being questioned, just verified she knew of my whereabouts (she explained I was married) I still LOL thinking of it!
Sue

•Posted by: Cheryl in Ohio on Tue, Oct 27, 98 at 13:58
I am at work and barely have any eye make up on now from the tears of laughter streaming down my face.
I was about 16 years old. My boyfriend had a parakeet that I had to take to my mom's house until he got into his apartment. I was playing with the bird prior to going to the store. At the shopping center people were looking at me kind of funny. I had just tried something new with my hair and figured that was why. Got home and was preparing to go out on a date, when I looked up in the mirror after rinsing from my tooth brushing. Bird poop on the top of my head. I am only 5'2", so a lot of the world can see the top of my head. I was so embarassed. I couldn't understand why one of those total strangers hadn't told me. But, how to you tell someone they have poop on their head.

•Posted by: Irem  on Tue, Oct 27, 98 at 14:44
This is similar to an early one. I worked in a small restaurant as a teenager. One Friday night it was even busier than usual and everyone was kind of stressed out. As I walk into the back area I notice one of the cooks on the phone. He tells me that I need to go see if there is a JIm Shoes in the place. I walk around to each table, politely asking each man if his name is Jim Shoes. I keep getting these weird looks and snickers from everyone, but still don't get it. I go back and tell the cook no one named Jim shoes is there. Even the owners started laughing. The cook finally says, " You didn't really go ask for Gym Shoes did you.?" Finally got it.

•Posted by: Louise  on Tue, Oct 27, 98 at 15:16
Oh too funny! We were at some friends house for fondue with six other couples. Everything going great but I'm getting kind of full so decide to lean back and take a break. Oops! Forgot I was sitting on a piano stool. A** over tea kettle into their dishwasher which was open. Only two glasses of wine but I'm sure everyone thought I was drunk. I didn't hurt anything but my pride. You know that feeling you get when you think of these kinds of things? We (DH and I) call it erase, erase. Wish I could have.

•Posted by: Diane  on Tue, Oct 27, 98 at 15:40
Several years ago while first learning to snow ski in Colorado, my sister and I were on our own one afternoon and after several runs to the top, I guess my legs must have been giving out on me. We decided to make one more run, came swooshing up to the chair lift line, where she stopped to get in line, but I didn't!! I just more or less swooshed on past several people in line and ended up landing on the seat of a chair lift with a very surprised man already sitting there. His comment: my friends told me I'd meet women on the slopes!!

•Posted by: Diane in MD on Tue, Oct 27, 98 at 16:18
Sorry. I can't help myself. Each post reminds me of something else.
In my snow skiing days we used to attach all our lift tickets (sometimes 20 or so) to our zipper pull. I rode the chair lift to the top, where you get off the chair, ski down a short slope, and the chair goes up and over your head, around an arc and back down the hill. My bunch of tickets, however, got wedged in the chair. Thank God it was a nice day and my jacket was unzipped because as I skied down, the parka pulled right off and up over my head, around the arc and back down the hill!
I froze my little tushy skiing down to the bottom of the mountain, thinking the whole way what could have happened if I had been a little chillier.
I guess the older we are the more moments like these we have to laugh about.

•Posted by: Deb  on Tue, Oct 27, 98 at 17:44
Well, someone said 'fess up so here goes. My dh & I are very quietly affectionate in public. When we're seated together one of the last things we do before getting up from the table is squeeze the other's thigh. A man we both knew died. He was a big wig in our church and the Bishop said his funeral mass. After the funeral & cemetery services we all went to the local Knights of Columbus hall for a meal. The Bishop likes me and sat next to me at the dinner. When he was finished he said goodbye he had to leave. Without thinking I put my hand in his lap and squeezed his thigh!! You can imagine my embarrassment. He looked at me and turned beet red. I've never seen an old man move that fast! This is a holy man, a priest for over 50 years for God's sake (no pun intended). As luck would have it my dh was assigned to the Cathedral church and now I see the Bishop once a month.
Deb

RE: Lucy Moments!and on and on
•Posted by: Sandi  on Tue, Oct 27, 98 at 18:10
Along with the "gym shoes" one, we used to send all the new people through the mall to all of the other shoe stores looking for a wall stretcher, our mall had way too many shoe stores, and everyone knew as soon as someone asked for a wall stretcher, they were new & to send them to another store.
Another funny is my DH's bosses last name is Gay, so whenever they go out to lunch they can't register under his name or they will ask for the gay party of 2!